I'm fortunate enough to be able to travel to such a beautiful city despite this godforsaken recession due to my amazing parents who urged me to study abroad.
My mom said, "I don't want you to graduate with any regrets."
And voila, I am now here in Paris via a study-abroad program. I'm taking two courses, French 1 and Social History of France, and, oh man, when they say that these courses are "intensive" they sure do mean it. I haven't been working HARD, but I have been working harder than I thought I would be. I guess I thought I'd come here and play all day .. I mean, I AM in Paris, right?
Wrong! Tomorrow I have a paper due in my social science course, a written exam in French, an oral presentation in French, and une exercice due also. I guess I shouldn't complain, I had all weekend to work on it.. But of course it escaped me. If it weren't for my wonderful friends here, I wouldn't even have remembered all four things!
But alas, I have. It is now 1:30am and I am pretty much done with everything except for studying. I think this is the hard part, though.. Memorizing vocabulary and words and conjugations in a completely foreign tongue. Welcome to UC Center Paris. Haha.
The intensive courses are sooo worth it though.. I'm so glad to have taken this opportunity. And to know that I'm learning new things while I'm here is just crazy.
J'adore Paris (:
Monday, June 29, 2009
Picture of the Day: Notre Dame Cathedral
I was able to get a picture so close to the front of the cathedral since Cindy and I attended the Mass there and sat pretty close up (taken right before we were stopped from taking pictures :P). The whole experience was so amaaaazing.
Sunday, June 28, 2009
Cathedrale Notre-Dame de Paris
I heard Mass at the Notre Dame Cathedral today and it was absolutely AMAZING. What's awesome is that the cathedral still functions as an actual place of worship, and isn't just another tourist spot.
The whole time I was in awe. Coming to Paris I didn't think I'd be attending Church at all considering I don't really understand French, but then DUH I have to go to church here. The city is full of churches and cathedrals, considering that France used to be recognized as a Catholic country. The Mass was in French and Latin so I didn't literally understand everything, but I go to Church enough to know what's going on.
The choir sounded AMAZING in the cathedral.. The crazy thing is that it was little girls and boys! The church was FULL of their singing and the organ playing.. And although it was a little dark (traditional cathedral music.. scary!), it was beautiful nonetheless.
But yesss, I'm so glad that I went to Mass today.. And to think I went at NOTRE DAME Cathedral! It still really amazes me..
I'm falling more and more in love with this city everyday <3
The whole time I was in awe. Coming to Paris I didn't think I'd be attending Church at all considering I don't really understand French, but then DUH I have to go to church here. The city is full of churches and cathedrals, considering that France used to be recognized as a Catholic country. The Mass was in French and Latin so I didn't literally understand everything, but I go to Church enough to know what's going on.
The choir sounded AMAZING in the cathedral.. The crazy thing is that it was little girls and boys! The church was FULL of their singing and the organ playing.. And although it was a little dark (traditional cathedral music.. scary!), it was beautiful nonetheless.
But yesss, I'm so glad that I went to Mass today.. And to think I went at NOTRE DAME Cathedral! It still really amazes me..
I'm falling more and more in love with this city everyday <3
Saturday, June 27, 2009
Picture of the Day: Eiffel Tower
I came here on my second day in Paris, and have decided that I will be coming back many, many more times! The location is BEAUTIFUL. So many places to picnic.. And it's also along the remarkable Seine River. Definitely a spot I will frequent often. I can't wait to see what it looks like in the night..
Friday, June 26, 2009
Bonjour de Paris!
I guess it's a good time to write a blog. I feel like I can never say enough to justify my experience so far, but alas I will do my best.
I arrived on Monday morning and got lost in Charles de Gaulle airport. SUCKS. That airport is sooo big and scary and nothing is in English! It's like stepping into the unknown.. I felt really sad and scared and out of place. Luckily a French woman was nice enough to give me some tips about being in this airport and also guide me to my exit.
Anyhow, I arrived at the center Monday morning knowing NO ONE. Seriously, no one. A lot of people on this program are girls, and most of them are actually pre-existing friends from UCSB. Made it a little harder for me to make friends (haha), but fortunately I did. Funnily enough, I've been hanging out mostly with another Christine (yes, two Christine's!), two Cindy's, and an Alex (and some other people sometimes). They've been fun to be around especially because they're down to explore the city and take advantage of what little time we have in Paris.
The lifestyle here is SOOO different from what I'm used to, and I realized that it's just something I have to get used to. I'm STILL not completely over my jet lag.. It's almost 8am here right now and I'm awake (definitely not typical). But I've been learning to adjust to the food here (they eat bread with everything!!), even though I've found that I'm CONSTANTLY still hungry. Parisians are a lot more conservative in dress than I thought, making it a little bit difficult for me to figure out to wear on the daily, but also making it so necessary for me to go shopping! I've found that the sun NEVER sleeps on Paris, literally! Makes it a bit harder for my jet lag, but making it easier for me to explore the beauty of the city without it being creepily dark. It's up when I wake up at 6am, and it doesn't set till about 11pm. I've been riding the Metro a lot, which is similar to the Bart system in the Bay Area (although so much more confusing in Paris!). It's so fast that it's impossible to be late anywhere. I have also discovered the creepiness of Parisian men (gross).. Getting hit on like a billion times a day is not the business. But it's all in the experience.
I've been having a lot of fun and I don't really know how else to explain. I guess I'll keep you all posted as time passes (hopefully it doesn't take me a billion years to update again haha).
Some key places I been to..
I went to the Eiffel Tower on Tuesday. It is soooooooo beautiful. SERIOUSLY. I never realized the grandeur of it all until I actually went. There are so many gypsies there trying to rob you of money though, actually quite annoying! But other than that, it's just amazing. And seeing it along the Seine River was just BREATHTAKING. Luckily the weather was perfect on that day. I plan to go back and picnic there just because it seriously is a beautiful and calming place to be.
I also went to the Louvre, although I didn't go in the museum yet. It was more of a field trip with my history/culture class, and we learned about the facades of the Louvre. I didn't really know the history of the Louvre coming to Paris.. I didn't even know that it used to be the kings' residence prior to Versailles. But learning about the different symbols on the building is just amazing.. And how the different kings left their marks on the city through this building. SERIOUSLY. I was in awe! I am definitely planning to go back, and especially planning to go into the museum (the center gave us a free pass to most of the museums in Paris! SWEET).
Yesterday we went to the Chateau de Chantilly, one of the castles here in Paris. It was soooo beautiful. And although the families that lived there weren't actual royalty, their castle is AMAZING. It has a stable that's seriously another castle in itself, because apparently the prince wanted to be reincarnated into a horse and needed a grand stable to live in. What the heck, right?! HAHA. But seriously... AMAZING. And the museum inside the castle was soo rich. I loved it.
I have yet to go to other museums and castles.. But so far I've just been awestruck at the wonders of this city. I absolutely LOVE Paris! It's so rich in history and culture, and just plain beautiful. More updates to come later!
Au revoir.. (:
I arrived on Monday morning and got lost in Charles de Gaulle airport. SUCKS. That airport is sooo big and scary and nothing is in English! It's like stepping into the unknown.. I felt really sad and scared and out of place. Luckily a French woman was nice enough to give me some tips about being in this airport and also guide me to my exit.
Anyhow, I arrived at the center Monday morning knowing NO ONE. Seriously, no one. A lot of people on this program are girls, and most of them are actually pre-existing friends from UCSB. Made it a little harder for me to make friends (haha), but fortunately I did. Funnily enough, I've been hanging out mostly with another Christine (yes, two Christine's!), two Cindy's, and an Alex (and some other people sometimes). They've been fun to be around especially because they're down to explore the city and take advantage of what little time we have in Paris.
The lifestyle here is SOOO different from what I'm used to, and I realized that it's just something I have to get used to. I'm STILL not completely over my jet lag.. It's almost 8am here right now and I'm awake (definitely not typical). But I've been learning to adjust to the food here (they eat bread with everything!!), even though I've found that I'm CONSTANTLY still hungry. Parisians are a lot more conservative in dress than I thought, making it a little bit difficult for me to figure out to wear on the daily, but also making it so necessary for me to go shopping! I've found that the sun NEVER sleeps on Paris, literally! Makes it a bit harder for my jet lag, but making it easier for me to explore the beauty of the city without it being creepily dark. It's up when I wake up at 6am, and it doesn't set till about 11pm. I've been riding the Metro a lot, which is similar to the Bart system in the Bay Area (although so much more confusing in Paris!). It's so fast that it's impossible to be late anywhere. I have also discovered the creepiness of Parisian men (gross).. Getting hit on like a billion times a day is not the business. But it's all in the experience.
I've been having a lot of fun and I don't really know how else to explain. I guess I'll keep you all posted as time passes (hopefully it doesn't take me a billion years to update again haha).
Some key places I been to..
I went to the Eiffel Tower on Tuesday. It is soooooooo beautiful. SERIOUSLY. I never realized the grandeur of it all until I actually went. There are so many gypsies there trying to rob you of money though, actually quite annoying! But other than that, it's just amazing. And seeing it along the Seine River was just BREATHTAKING. Luckily the weather was perfect on that day. I plan to go back and picnic there just because it seriously is a beautiful and calming place to be.
I also went to the Louvre, although I didn't go in the museum yet. It was more of a field trip with my history/culture class, and we learned about the facades of the Louvre. I didn't really know the history of the Louvre coming to Paris.. I didn't even know that it used to be the kings' residence prior to Versailles. But learning about the different symbols on the building is just amazing.. And how the different kings left their marks on the city through this building. SERIOUSLY. I was in awe! I am definitely planning to go back, and especially planning to go into the museum (the center gave us a free pass to most of the museums in Paris! SWEET).
Yesterday we went to the Chateau de Chantilly, one of the castles here in Paris. It was soooo beautiful. And although the families that lived there weren't actual royalty, their castle is AMAZING. It has a stable that's seriously another castle in itself, because apparently the prince wanted to be reincarnated into a horse and needed a grand stable to live in. What the heck, right?! HAHA. But seriously... AMAZING. And the museum inside the castle was soo rich. I loved it.
I have yet to go to other museums and castles.. But so far I've just been awestruck at the wonders of this city. I absolutely LOVE Paris! It's so rich in history and culture, and just plain beautiful. More updates to come later!
Au revoir.. (:
Thursday, June 25, 2009
Picture of the Day: Disneyland
I've been following Siene's blog, and lately he's been doing a Picture of the Day post.. I think I'm going to start doing the same!
The Friday before I left for Paris, Paolo and I went on a date to Disneyland. It was one of theee most fun times I've had at Disneyland because we were so accomplished!! Hehe. Anyway, I picked this picture for my picture of the day because the random person who took our picture took it diagonally so as to get the whole castle, and Paolo ended up liking it a lot. So, there it is!
I've been in Paris for a couple days now and I still haven't written my Paris post. But do not fret, I have started a draft and will continue it when I have time!
The Friday before I left for Paris, Paolo and I went on a date to Disneyland. It was one of theee most fun times I've had at Disneyland because we were so accomplished!! Hehe. Anyway, I picked this picture for my picture of the day because the random person who took our picture took it diagonally so as to get the whole castle, and Paolo ended up liking it a lot. So, there it is!
I've been in Paris for a couple days now and I still haven't written my Paris post. But do not fret, I have started a draft and will continue it when I have time!
Monday, June 22, 2009
Fomunda cheeeeeese
One of the reasons I LOVE being home so much.. Cuz it's sooo silly! :P
agrace: omg you wanna know something allan said?!
christine: what?
agrace: so i said "i'm craving parmesan cheese."
agrace: then he goes "do you want some fomunda chese?!"
agrace: then i go, "What kinda cheese is that?"
agrace: then he goes "fomunda my nuts!!!"
agrace: GROSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!
christine: AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH
I love my fam and the weirdness we surround ourselves with!
Anyway, I am now in Paris suffering from a mean spell of jet lag (it's 6:18am here and I woke up at like 330am). I'll post something exciting later.. Till then!
agrace: omg you wanna know something allan said?!
christine: what?
agrace: so i said "i'm craving parmesan cheese."
agrace: then he goes "do you want some fomunda chese?!"
agrace: then i go, "What kinda cheese is that?"
agrace: then he goes "fomunda my nuts!!!"
agrace: GROSSS!!!!!!!!!!!!
christine: AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHHAHAHAHAH
I love my fam and the weirdness we surround ourselves with!
Anyway, I am now in Paris suffering from a mean spell of jet lag (it's 6:18am here and I woke up at like 330am). I'll post something exciting later.. Till then!
Sunday, June 21, 2009
Leaving
Going to the airport in about 2 hours and I don't quite know how to feel. I'm not so much excited as I am anxious, especially because I know how I get whenever I'm placed in a new environment. It takes me a while to warm up to things, but hopefully not too long this time cuz I only have 6 weeks to enjoy myself.
I am really going to miss my Paolo. It feels like every time we are exactly where we need to be, our relationship is put to the test. I know we can get through anything together now, but I'm going to miss him soooo much. Like I said before, I hate not knowing. So much could change in 6 weeks, but as our past experience has proven, the way we feel about each other is about as steady as it gets. We just have to remind ourselves constantly. Webcam, AIM, and text will pretty much be all we have to keep our relationship strong.
Anyway, of course I'm going to miss my fam and best friends. I wish so much that my best friends could be experiencing this with me because everything we do together is EPIC. Just imagine the damage we'd do in that city..
I guess I'll take a nap for an hour before I hit the shower. I guess for my next post I'll be writing from Paris. I'll try not to keep anyone waiting too long..
Until then. (:
I am really going to miss my Paolo. It feels like every time we are exactly where we need to be, our relationship is put to the test. I know we can get through anything together now, but I'm going to miss him soooo much. Like I said before, I hate not knowing. So much could change in 6 weeks, but as our past experience has proven, the way we feel about each other is about as steady as it gets. We just have to remind ourselves constantly. Webcam, AIM, and text will pretty much be all we have to keep our relationship strong.
Anyway, of course I'm going to miss my fam and best friends. I wish so much that my best friends could be experiencing this with me because everything we do together is EPIC. Just imagine the damage we'd do in that city..
I guess I'll take a nap for an hour before I hit the shower. I guess for my next post I'll be writing from Paris. I'll try not to keep anyone waiting too long..
Until then. (:
Wednesday, June 17, 2009
T-Sweezy!
Not gonna lie, but I'm a not-so-secret fan of Taylor Swift. I think of all the young famous people these days, she's one of the ones with the most class; she carries herself so well. Plus she seems SUPER chill and nice and sweet and funny. HAHA. Anyway, check it. This video of her is just TOOO CUTE!
Tuesday, June 16, 2009
Buyer's remorse
Of all the accessories tempting me, designer purses have always been the main weakness.
Yesterday, my mom and I went to the store and I fell in love with this adorable Coach tote. WOW. It was way too much money ($287.. and this was even on sale from $358) so I turned and walked away...
Today, my mom and I went to another store and I saw the same tote on clearance for $215. I bought it. My mom kind of guilted me into it, telling me I'll never get a deal this great on it ever again. She's right.
But, why do I feel so guilty? And where do I get off spending that type of money on a purse? Siiigh. Buyer's remorse DOES exist. I'm usually very very picky about buying purses, because the amount of money that gets spent on them is RIDICULOUS. I caved today! Never thought it would happen to me.
Hopefully this icky feeling goes away soon, so I could enjoy the adorable new tote I have!
Yesterday, my mom and I went to the store and I fell in love with this adorable Coach tote. WOW. It was way too much money ($287.. and this was even on sale from $358) so I turned and walked away...
Today, my mom and I went to another store and I saw the same tote on clearance for $215. I bought it. My mom kind of guilted me into it, telling me I'll never get a deal this great on it ever again. She's right.
But, why do I feel so guilty? And where do I get off spending that type of money on a purse? Siiigh. Buyer's remorse DOES exist. I'm usually very very picky about buying purses, because the amount of money that gets spent on them is RIDICULOUS. I caved today! Never thought it would happen to me.
Hopefully this icky feeling goes away soon, so I could enjoy the adorable new tote I have!
Monday, June 15, 2009
Time, where are you?
It's crazy to think that in exactly ONE WEEK I will be in PARIS, FRANCE telling you all about how much I love it. It's seriously a dream come true!!! I'm so excited and I really can't wait.
Until then though, I still have a week left to make the most of my summer here in SD. This past weekend was one of the BEST weekends since I got to spend it with my love. Our nights consisted of eating, drinking, sleeping, and not coming home until 3pm the next day. Go figure (: He's the best and I never ever ever regret spending time with him, but I always miss him incredibly when we separate.
I was also able to kick off spending time with my SUMMER MAINS (if you don't know, that's me, Siene, and Krisha.. duh!). Those two are always down to do anything and that's what I love about them. It's never a dull moment, even when we have NOTHING to do. We make things happen.
Anyway, with this last week in SD before I leave, we've got some planning to do. Tomorrow we're going to the SD Fair I think? And Thursday Six Flags? And Friday I might go to Disneyland with Paolo *crosses fingers*. I'm just really looking forward to all that this week has in store for me, despite the stress of making sure I have all my stuff sorted and packed for the trip. I'm dipping at about 4am on Sunday Morning.. Crazyyy how time really does fly.
Until then though, I still have a week left to make the most of my summer here in SD. This past weekend was one of the BEST weekends since I got to spend it with my love. Our nights consisted of eating, drinking, sleeping, and not coming home until 3pm the next day. Go figure (: He's the best and I never ever ever regret spending time with him, but I always miss him incredibly when we separate.
I was also able to kick off spending time with my SUMMER MAINS (if you don't know, that's me, Siene, and Krisha.. duh!). Those two are always down to do anything and that's what I love about them. It's never a dull moment, even when we have NOTHING to do. We make things happen.
Anyway, with this last week in SD before I leave, we've got some planning to do. Tomorrow we're going to the SD Fair I think? And Thursday Six Flags? And Friday I might go to Disneyland with Paolo *crosses fingers*. I'm just really looking forward to all that this week has in store for me, despite the stress of making sure I have all my stuff sorted and packed for the trip. I'm dipping at about 4am on Sunday Morning.. Crazyyy how time really does fly.
Wednesday, June 10, 2009
No such thing as too much fun!
Summer has really been kicking into full gear as of late, and I am absolutely enjoying every minute of it!
Seriously though, there has not ONCE been a dull moment in my ever-so-exciting summer. I go on these 4-5 day alcohol binges with my friends, take a day to detox, and then do it all over again. I am currently on my second detox of the summer. I don't know how or why we drink as much as we do, but somehow I can never say no to their "Hey let's play beer pong" or "Let's go to the bar." And every night my "I'm not gonna drink tonight.." or "My goal is to not get too drunk!" plans fail. Haha. But all in good fun. I've only had one massive hangover (upon which I took my first alcohol detox) which was last week.. And I just thought I would give my body a break last night and today. I'll probably end up going to the bar later cuz that's how I do. Haha.
Anywayyyy, I've been doing other productive things as well! I've been babysitting like CRAZY, working on AiR music and director things, spending a good amount of phone time with Paolo, and I also managed to go to a day spa yesterday and get a full body massage. It was heavenly!
Just a few snippets of the awesomeness that has been my summer so far. It's crazy how much you can accomplish in a short amount of time!
Anyway, I have yet to go shopping for my Paris trip and finish other AiR business. I can't believe I only have a week and a half until I'm off to cross the Atlantic to France. CRAZY.
But I AM looking forward to Paolo fiiiiiinally coming down to San Diego tomorrow. I've missed him so much!!! I'm very happy with the growth we have achieved as a couple and I am so excited to see what the future has in store for us.
So that's that. I'm going to work out right now because the feeling of alcohol detox is NASTY. My body is so upset with me.. Haha! But at least I've been doing well to work out almost daily also. Yaaay summer!
Seriously though, there has not ONCE been a dull moment in my ever-so-exciting summer. I go on these 4-5 day alcohol binges with my friends, take a day to detox, and then do it all over again. I am currently on my second detox of the summer. I don't know how or why we drink as much as we do, but somehow I can never say no to their "Hey let's play beer pong" or "Let's go to the bar." And every night my "I'm not gonna drink tonight.." or "My goal is to not get too drunk!" plans fail. Haha. But all in good fun. I've only had one massive hangover (upon which I took my first alcohol detox) which was last week.. And I just thought I would give my body a break last night and today. I'll probably end up going to the bar later cuz that's how I do. Haha.
Anywayyyy, I've been doing other productive things as well! I've been babysitting like CRAZY, working on AiR music and director things, spending a good amount of phone time with Paolo, and I also managed to go to a day spa yesterday and get a full body massage. It was heavenly!
Just a few snippets of the awesomeness that has been my summer so far. It's crazy how much you can accomplish in a short amount of time!
Anyway, I have yet to go shopping for my Paris trip and finish other AiR business. I can't believe I only have a week and a half until I'm off to cross the Atlantic to France. CRAZY.
But I AM looking forward to Paolo fiiiiiinally coming down to San Diego tomorrow. I've missed him so much!!! I'm very happy with the growth we have achieved as a couple and I am so excited to see what the future has in store for us.
So that's that. I'm going to work out right now because the feeling of alcohol detox is NASTY. My body is so upset with me.. Haha! But at least I've been doing well to work out almost daily also. Yaaay summer!
Monday, June 1, 2009
Love like this
I woke up this morning after a crazy dream that I was someone else's girlfriend. The boy in my dream was super fiiine though. Haha. But besides that, when I woke up I found myself incredibly sad cuz I didn't wake up next to the one I needed to be with to reassure me that we're okay.
I gave him a call and he was still sleeping, but hearing his voice was enough to remind me that I'm all right, we're all right.
The dream made me feel uneasy because it reminded me of the stupid things I did in my past, the me I am not proud of. I've done a lot of things I shouldn't have, and there is no way in my heart or mind that I ever want to re-visit any of those past actions in my present life. I've made mistakes but I've also learned from them, and I'm so glad that the one I'm with is patient and understanding enough to let me continue learning.
I owe a lot of my current self to him; he's taught me so much. It may sound unreal but I've learned to be so much more independent being with him. I've learned to love myself and someone else because of everything we've been through. I honestly couldn't have asked for a better hand to hold and guide me and help me become a better person.
Anyway, enough of this mushy lovey doveyness. All I know is..
"I never thought I'd be in love like this"
I gave him a call and he was still sleeping, but hearing his voice was enough to remind me that I'm all right, we're all right.
The dream made me feel uneasy because it reminded me of the stupid things I did in my past, the me I am not proud of. I've done a lot of things I shouldn't have, and there is no way in my heart or mind that I ever want to re-visit any of those past actions in my present life. I've made mistakes but I've also learned from them, and I'm so glad that the one I'm with is patient and understanding enough to let me continue learning.
I owe a lot of my current self to him; he's taught me so much. It may sound unreal but I've learned to be so much more independent being with him. I've learned to love myself and someone else because of everything we've been through. I honestly couldn't have asked for a better hand to hold and guide me and help me become a better person.
Anyway, enough of this mushy lovey doveyness. All I know is..
"I never thought I'd be in love like this"
Growing up, growing on..
Coming back to San Diego is a different experience for me every single time. This time around I only have three weeks of relaxation before I head out the country. It's all good though, I've been making the most of it so far.
Seeing as how I'm barely in SD anymore, it's increasingly become a reality that while I still refer to SD as home, it's become more of a vacation spot for me, somewhere I go to escape the chaos of school and stress and work and everything that Berkeley and the Bay Area has come to represent (although I do love Berkeley!). I was born and raised in San Diego.. 18 years definitely cannot be erased from my heart and mind.
But to get to the point, I've barely been home for 3 days and luckily I've got to chill with some of the people on my to-chill-with list during my 3 weeks here. I swear, every time I come home though I realize how much I've distanced myself from the life I used to live. I don't regret it at all, cuz the changes I've made to my life have been so necessary for me to get to where I am today. But at the same time, it just makes me realize how fast things could change.
Just the other day, my homegirl was telling me about our high school friend who is now pregnant, which brought up the story of another friend who is also pregnant, and then she started telling me how so-and-so is married, so-and-so broke up, etc. You get the picture. But the whole time we were talking I was in a "WTF?!" state and she was just like, "Girl, you didn't know?! Where've you been?!"
Seriously though.. where have I been? Since moving up to Berkeley in fall 2006 I left behind the parts of me that I did not want to see in my future. I've always had an idea of where I wanted to be in a few years and realized that there were definitely some changes I needed to make in order to get there. I'm not trying to say the people we were talking about were not important, but my priorities changed a LOT. It's nice to hear about what happened to this girl or that boy now that it's been 3 years since we graduated high school. But it also feels good knowing that I've been growing into the person I want to be, whether or not that means leaving some old parts of me back in the place that I only visit a few times a year.
Of course, this is definitely not discounting the friends I still have and am still close to since high school and graduation. They know who they are--the ones that have made coming back to SD soooo worth it every single time. And while I've definitely grown out of some of the past drama that I used to be all too familiar with, I am glad that there are some people who are STILL with me despite the time and distance. I love that we all get to see each other's growth and progress; it's a beautiful thing.
Seeing as how I'm barely in SD anymore, it's increasingly become a reality that while I still refer to SD as home, it's become more of a vacation spot for me, somewhere I go to escape the chaos of school and stress and work and everything that Berkeley and the Bay Area has come to represent (although I do love Berkeley!). I was born and raised in San Diego.. 18 years definitely cannot be erased from my heart and mind.
But to get to the point, I've barely been home for 3 days and luckily I've got to chill with some of the people on my to-chill-with list during my 3 weeks here. I swear, every time I come home though I realize how much I've distanced myself from the life I used to live. I don't regret it at all, cuz the changes I've made to my life have been so necessary for me to get to where I am today. But at the same time, it just makes me realize how fast things could change.
Just the other day, my homegirl was telling me about our high school friend who is now pregnant, which brought up the story of another friend who is also pregnant, and then she started telling me how so-and-so is married, so-and-so broke up, etc. You get the picture. But the whole time we were talking I was in a "WTF?!" state and she was just like, "Girl, you didn't know?! Where've you been?!"
Seriously though.. where have I been? Since moving up to Berkeley in fall 2006 I left behind the parts of me that I did not want to see in my future. I've always had an idea of where I wanted to be in a few years and realized that there were definitely some changes I needed to make in order to get there. I'm not trying to say the people we were talking about were not important, but my priorities changed a LOT. It's nice to hear about what happened to this girl or that boy now that it's been 3 years since we graduated high school. But it also feels good knowing that I've been growing into the person I want to be, whether or not that means leaving some old parts of me back in the place that I only visit a few times a year.
Of course, this is definitely not discounting the friends I still have and am still close to since high school and graduation. They know who they are--the ones that have made coming back to SD soooo worth it every single time. And while I've definitely grown out of some of the past drama that I used to be all too familiar with, I am glad that there are some people who are STILL with me despite the time and distance. I love that we all get to see each other's growth and progress; it's a beautiful thing.
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